wildkotetsu | 5 • Wild Tiger • [Action]

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5 • Wild Tiger • [Action]

[He wakes up groggily from the sedatives and decides it's entirely fine to try to walk with what's left of it in his system.

The first thing he doesn't notice is that instead of walking on two feet, he's staggering around on four; the reason being, he's just a silly old tiger, one with poor memory and very poor human skills, possibly because he has none whatsoever; the train of thought a human would have is lost on him—there are trees and he knows they are good for scratching claws on. There's snow on the ground from a night's snow a few days prior, and he's aware it's wet and cold.

He's also aware of something squeezing his wrist uncomfortably. He gnaws the shit out of his watch before he gives up and let's it stay on his kitty wrist, accompanying a extremely-stretched bracelet of beads.

And he's hungry. And still tired. Mmm... Sleep is good.

sleeping tiger, unhidden tiger

There might be a tiger finding a place to sleep around you; be it in your room—a window or an opened door, perhaps—in your bed, on your couch. There might be a wild jungle cat just sleeping it up. There might be one out on the path curled up snoozing. Or... for some people, he might recognize your house or apartment and sneak in to sleep in your abode or on your step.

Either way, there's a tiger with green wings hanging around.

Or.

You may wake up to find a strange sound in the morning... The sound of shuffling, of glasses breaking, of cupboards and fridges being broken. That is because this confused tiger, caught between its natural and unnatural side, can't for the life of him figure out how he works this thing or how he recognizes the shapes of certain objects. Like handles. Which he breaks pretty easily. He's a big-ass creature, you know.

Walking in may reveal wraps and plates and misc. things on the floor; he's possibly enjoying a nice uncooked chicken breast or ripping your cereal box to shit. In fact, he might just bust into the restaurant, grocery store, or any other place with food so that he can devour it.

Don't worry, though. He's a pretty friendly tiger, for the most part; as in, he won't try to eat you. Because as animal as he is, he hasn't forgotten what he is: that thing being that he's a dumb but relatively heroic fella. His hazy mind vaguely recalls this strange desire... Can't go beating people up and ripping out their innards, y'know.]

[[ooc: all replies coming from

literalwildtiger ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Diplomacy has failed us. We must resort to weapons of mass destruction.

Or just his feet. Sanji doesn't kick him yet, but he's up and stalking forward.]

I said get lost, bastard.

... [You know, he's actually remembering something about your face. Mainly how you enjoy beating things up or getting mad at them; tiger's not sure where this comes from, but it's there—so he does what any ~~dumb~~ god-fearing creature would do:

He puts his paws over his face and waits to get beat up.

`_` please spare me]

[... Nothing diffuses anger faster than a huge tiger cowering as you approach. Um. Hell. Sanji almost feels bad. And it catches the chef in an awkward position, stuck between selfish annoyance and uncertain logic. When you get down to it, the tiger didn't do anything worthy of punishment, unless listening to its shitty instincts is a crime.

B| Damn you. It was easier wanting to kick your furry ass.]

... Oi. [He continues his approach, but without the murderous intent] Quit looking so pathetic; it's embarrassing.

[The flattened out tail slowly flutters back up and Kotetsu drops his paws staring at Sanji; the tone is pretty easy to pick up on. Hostility reads pretty well across all animals, after all. Content that he's not about to die, he makes a friendly sound.

I remember you. You were... something. But it's in my head, okay?

He scooches forward with his back and front paws a few inches.]

[... This is a very domesticated tiger. Took Sanji long enough to note it. And once the thought is established, the first thing he does is trail his gaze over the animal's back and - ah, what do you know? B|

So it's either an unlucky bastard or a New Feather. Sanji mutters a smoky curse under his breath, then crouches down on his hind legs]

Listen, can you understand me? [Hell, can you talk? Any hint to the tiger's identity would be swell, because as it stands, the chef isn't sure if he should be leading the animal to the village or letting him run wild.]

[He's not even paying any attention to Sanji when he asks, instead going for a nice tongue bath. This paw needs to be licked, good sir. He just figures you're making casual noises; birds do it a lot. Static noise of 'blah blah blah' or something to that effect, right?]

[alksfdja;sfhoi]

Pay attention already!

[UGH if not for the location Sanji would just take off rather than deal with the idiot. As it is... have a rock aimed at your skull, tiger. It's an acceptable compromise to kicking!]

[It... sorta' bounces off his head and makes a nice muffled thump noise. But he flinches and looks back up, alarmed. What the hey. I was jut trying to get all clean and stuff.

He huffs a noseful of breath at Sanji, grumping like a true old jungle cat.]

[This isn't getting them anywhere. Sanji deems the tiger either extremely stupid or just incapable of understanding human language. He'll have to literally herd the big cat.

So he stands up first and foremost, returning the grumpy look... and completely unsure what he should do now.]

Uh... Get over here. [And then he makes a come hither motion with his hands while stepping backwards. >_> VISUAL REFERENCE!]

....

[Fiiiine. He rises his four or so feet in height and walks over, shoving his nose into one of the hands; you wanna' dope around? He can totally do that. As illustrated now, when he shoves at Sanji's knee playfully with his side.

Just no more rocks and we're good, buddy.]

[... It worked.

Pardon his surprise, Sanji expected this to get ugly before it smelled of roses. He celebrates his moment of triumph with a satisfied grunt, automatically racing his hand over the tiger's head and ears before he realizes what he's doing.

It's like Pumpkin if she were twenty times her size and ate deer instead of fish.]

You're not much of a shitty tiger, are you? [He turns and starts walking properly, though slowly, just in case his acquaintance runs off] C'mon. This place is important. I can't let you trash it.

[Meh, fine. He'll be glad to follow, anyway; feels like the right thing to do. Not sure why, but it is. Maybe it's something about your voice... :|a

He follows, leaving heavy footprints in what's left of the small traces of snow, grass bending under the weight. Best lead him well, Sanji, if you want to spare any patches of flowers from a paw. Maybe try to creep after a squirrel if you're not mindful.]

[Sanji is watching like a hawk; the moment it even looks like the tiger's paws might stray too far, he pulls lightly at one of the ears with a chiding "Oi oi", trying to scoot the beast over.

Which is harder than it looks. In the weight department, the tiger could probably bench press Sanji.]

Why the hell do I have to babysit you? [Another grudging sigh as he bumps into Kotetsu before he tramples on another patch of flowers] Be careful!

[Mmmrrr. He swivels his ears in displeasure at that, but it can only do so much when you pull on it anyway. He offers an equally grudgeful push back with his head, but that's about as much of a confrontation as Tigertetsu can really muster.

Oi, oi, don't be a bully, Sanji. It's rude.

Did he just... stick his tongue at you, when you looked at him? Naaah. That had to have been just a weird coincidence thing.]

[Sanji hasn't been around many tigers in his life - most of them he had to kick out of his way - but is this... normal behavior? The result of a mallynap? Or maybe just the way tigers act on some backwards planet?

ALSO HE SAW THAT TONGUE. Accident or not, he nearly sticks his own back at you. But no, that would be silly.]

Don't give me that look. [He doesn't care if you don't understand; Sanji will talk at you, and you will like it.] It's your own damn fault for charging in here. [bumping him back, though this time it's merely payback, and it's not very hard either.] Who knows how soon they'll grow back.

[:|

He bumps you back again.

Heheheh.

Is he standing proudly, like he's awesome? I think so.]

...

[BUMP]

[`_`

...

BUMP]

[ALkadhofif topple.]

I'LL KILL YOU, BASTARD!

[THIS FACE, while he's busy strutting around Sanji's defeat. Awwww yeaaaaah. I still got it, man, I still got it. HUEHUEHUEHUE.]

Tch. Get the hell away from me before I kick you into a tree, shitty fleabag. [He gets back on his feet, brushing dirt and dead grass off his pants]

Finish your victory lap so we can go. [Or he'll leave you behind. B|]

[Awww, don't be a sore loser about it. He cautiously struts back over, bumping his forehead into Sanji's arm. We cool, man? Oiiii, Sanji, don't be all grumpy about it, I was just teasing. :(]

[... He really hopes you're not secretly a villager, or he'll have a hard time explaining later why his hand gradually migrates over to your ears and starts scratching behind them.

Sue him; he likes cats. Even stupid ones that act suspiciously human at times.]

[Ooooh, yes, that's the spot.

... You're so hosed when I turn back into a dopey human guy.

Once they're out of the area Sanji seeks so carefully to guard, Kotetsu takes the hint and finally tromps around heavily, looking up at the chef as if he's asking permission to be a total forest-wrecker.

MAAA, COME ON, ALL THESE TREES AND FURRY ANIMALS AND GRASS TO EAT.]

[Give him a second. He needs to double-check and make sure they're in the clear - not a flower in sight - before he turns to Kotetsu in mild exasperation. His eyes briefly close as he pulls out a fresh cigarette, bringing it to his lips and muttering around it]

Do what you want, idiot.

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